Confidence is essential to success, but it isn’t always easy to maintain. Thankfully, it can be an acquired skill, just follow these 5 simple steps…
#1 - BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
"Whether you think you can, or can’t, you’re right." - Henry Ford
The quickest way to tear down your confidence is to fill your mind with negativity, worry, and fear of failure. Instead, envision only the fabulous things that are destined to happen once you inevitably succeed, and do not even consider failure an option. In reality, it isn’t. Worst case scenario: things don’t go as planned. Let’s be honest, things rarely go as planned.
Thankfully, there exists an invisible safety net between us and any risk we’ve ever taken: the simple fact that everything will eventually fall into place and work itself out (dare I say, for the better). Go after what you want optimistically, as if you are able and deserving of accomplishment (because you are). Trust positivity to lead you into a rhythm of success, and it will.
#2 - TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE
"Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out?" - What a Girl Wants
We all want to be liked. We all want to be accepted. Sometimes, in the midst of trying to fit in, we hide who we are because we are afraid of being judged, rejected, ridiculed, or -gasp- different.
You are unique. I am unique. Do not be fooled, this is what makes us beautiful. We have certain personalities, beliefs, philosophies, opinions, dreams, abilities, disabilities, quirks, and qualities that define who we are. Do not ever be afraid to be you. Plant yourself firmly in the foundation of your truth and your confidence will be unwavering.
#3 - KNOW YOUR WORTH
"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes." - Sally Field
Holly, one of the pastors at my church, said last Sunday that most battles begin and end in the mind. I believe the same can be said for the battle of confidence. True confidence comes from within. Pseudo-confidence can be influenced by many outside factors - success, failure, health, wealth, opportunities, career, family, friends, and so called friends, to list a few.
What do these things have in common? They are external and transient, yet we often allow these factors to influence how we feel about ourselves and we internalize the self-doubt that comes with it. We cannot always change these factors, but we can choose to not base our confidence on them. Decide today that you are worthy.
Make an affirmation to yourself that you are deserving, capable, beautiful, strong, and destined to shine. Perceive yourself as confident from within and reflect this stance in your actions. If you feel that someone or something is threatening your confidence, dismiss those feelings of inferiority because they are an illusion that you do not have to accept. You and I have an endless source of true internal confidence that will forever remain unscathed as long as we choose it to be so.
#4 - SET YOUR OWN BAR
"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt
Do not try to keep up with the Joneses or the Kardashians. Let go of comparing yourself to others. Set your own benchmark. Your expectations for yourself should be high, but they should be your own. Jealousy is a self-destructive disease and if it is an ever-present theme in your life, chances are confidence is not.
Take control of your own self-perception. Replace jealousy with humility, grace, gratefulness, and happiness. This will turn into confidence. Remember, true confidence comes from the inside, once you choose to accept that, jealousy, social status, appearance, and materialism become meaningless.
#5 - PURSUE YOUR PASSION
“If there is no passion in your life, then have you really lived? Find your passion, whatever it may be. Become it, and let it become you, and you will find great things happen for you, to you and because of you.” - T. Alan Armstrong
Chasing your dreams takes guts, and by guts, I mean confidence. Success, happiness, and prosperity are not guaranteed. You have to believe in yourself enough to trust that you can obtain these things by pursuing what you are passionate about.
It seems like a catch 22… pursuing your dreams will give you confidence, but you need to first possess confidence in order to have the courage to pursue your dreams. Where does that initial confidence come from? You guessed it - it comes from within. You are not here by mistake, you were born with a purpose.
You may not think you know what your your purpose is, or where your passion lies, but trust me, if you look deep inside you will discover it if you choose to. Passion is what makes your eyes light up. Your purpose is what makes life worth living. Pursuing your passion with purpose is what makes you feel alive. That unparalleled feeling of LIVING is the revelation of your innate confidence radiating through every ounce of your being.